Reasons Alice Shouldn't Be Trusted
- She enjoys using her purple handle scissors immensely. Victims to date include, but are not limited to, Rapunzel, Blinking Dora, Sydney Barbie, countless mermaids, and herself.
- She can move her kitchen stool to the sink, reach the soap, and turn on the water. Washing dishes and dolls is a favored pastime. Flooding the counter and floor is merely a ramification.
- Her size allows her to reach almost anything on any shelf. What she can not reach on her own, standing on a chair can fix.
- Independence can cause her to overestimate her ability. Much to her, and my, dismay she can not lift, carry and pour a cup of oj from a full gallon.
- For research purposes alone, she could flush anything down the toilet at any moment.
- She feels that glue and tape are one in the same.
- Her sweet tooth and early morning hunger pangs turn her into a savage beast. A factory sealed bag of chocolate chips is no match for her teeth.
- First and foremost, Alice is an artist. Young artist are a danger to themselves and their surroundings.