Monday, June 11, 2012

Men and the Not-So-Obvious

While at the pool yesterday, pretending the small child whining and pouting for no apparent reason was not mine, I overheard an argument conversation between a husband and wife. The couple has two kids, a 3 year old and a 5 month old. From the words we've exchanged, I gather they are good people.

The conversation starts like this, husband in the lower level pool with 3 year old, wife at the upper level pool holding baby begins to yell to husband. It's noisy and crowded and yet, the couple is successfully having a yelling conversation between two separate pools overtop of the noise of the children playing and splashing.

Wife: Where did you put the baby sunscreen?

Hubs: What sunscreen?

Wife: The sunscreen...FOR THE BABY?

Hubs: I dunno. In the bag?

Wife: It's not there. What did you do with it at the house?

Hubs: What do you mean?

Wife: When you were at the house. You put sunscreen on the baby. What did you do with it when you were done?

Hubs: I put it in the bag.

Wife: You put the baby sunscreen in the bag?

Hubs: What do you mean "baby sunscreen?"

Wife: The sunscreen that's just for THE BABY. Thats what you used on her, right?

Hubs: Oh. That bottle ran out. So I just used other sunscreen.

Wife: You used the other sunscreen? ON THE BABY?!

At this point, the wife rolled her eyes, ended the conversation and walked away. I recognized the look on her face. I've made that face before. My eyes have rolled in the exact same way, saying the exact same thing. It's a universal look.

"My man is a tool."

In all reality, her husband may or may not be a tool. That's for her to decide. But I know for sure where she went wrong. Where I often go wrong. I assume my husband thinks like me.

He doesn't. Shocking, I know.

He's a man and men think very different than the ladies. Things that are obvious to me go completely unnoticed by him. I assume that some things can just go unsaid because any normal, halfway intelligent person is already aware. Apparently, this isn't always the case. And surprisingly it has nothing to do with their intelligence, or lack there of.

Where to go from here? I have the knowledge that men and women don't think alike. Though, that doesn't directly help me with the daily frustrations. I have come up with three options.

a.) Care less about having things done "the right way" i.e., my way.

b.) Be very vigilant about slowing down to explain my expectations thoroughly.

c.) Do it myself.

I'm not certain as to the correct answer. I imagine the good marriage doctors would say a nice combination of a and b, with a kiss and a smile to top it off. I tend to lean heavily on good ole "if you want something done right, do it yourself."

Where do you weigh in?

1 comment:

  1. The never ending story of marriage.

    I strive for A and B, but sometimes C is just the easier way to go. Marriage is hard.